This post will explain my unexpected two month hiatus and discuss something that I have been thinking about recently....
Let's start with my hiatus:
So about 2 months ago, a little longer as of today, I just dropped everything in my life... because I have depression.
I am 19 and I have depression. I have had it since I was in middle school. Middle school, remember in a previous post I talked about the bullying and all the other bullshit I went through then? And how my mom would call me fat? How my self-esteem was so low? It was then it started.
I don't remember how much I wrote about in that post... but in middle school, I cut myself. It felt good. It made me forget the pressure... the pain I felt from my life. I did it from sixth to eighth grade. And yeah, there was only one person that helped me stop... my best friend. She made me promise. I didn't cut myself at all through high school... even though I was bullied and called a 'whore,' though I was still a virgin... I have no idea why people bullied me in high school.
Actually, it might've been that I tried to view myself as better than them. Better than most of the girls because I didn't (and still don't) have a religion that I force on people. Because I didn't tell someone "You're going to hell for believing in abortions! For being gay!" Yeah. I lived in one of those towns. A bunch of religious lunatics forcing religion down our throats for the sake of 'trying to save others.' What a load of bullshit. At least the sex ed class was almost evenly matched. My teacher talked about safe sex, at least. But the school brought in some guy who, as you guessed it, preached abstinence. Which is all well and good, but... the more you tell kids not to do something... they're gonna do it.
I fought stupidity through high school. Being bullied for my beliefs, being bullied for standing up with the Gay-Straight Alliance.... Now that I look back on it (as I rebuild my self-esteem and self-worth... with the help of my wonderful boyfriend)...man... I wish I would've realized how much high school and middle school would fuck me over and destroy me. If I could go back (I know it's cliche) I would tell myself, 'Hey, look up from here. Your mom's bullshit will come back around. Don't worry about what your dad does.... don't date these guys, you got a guy waiting for you in a couple years. Oh, and keep your beliefs. You're going to get stronger, girl. Just wait.'
So... I think that explains the hiatus. I am trying to work on myself. I am starting to keep a journal again, listening to music, and counting down the days until I move back to St. Louis. ....Oh, I moved out to Oklahoma for a little while to get myself back together. I've been a mess and my dad decided to ship me out to my best friend. I have been here two months already. I feel pretty stress free, except that I can't find a freaking job to save up money to move in with my boyfriend and guy friends.
Moving on to 'homeschooling.'
My friend has been going through the same bullshit I did in middle school... depression, her parents to absorbed in another child.... hanging out with a group of friends that aren't nessecarily good for her (probably by her parent's standard) and how her parents just took her out of public high school and decided to raise her that way.
Now, I will have to say, I am not a fan of home-schooling. Granted it may have been proven that homeschooled students may outperform their peers... there is a lot of things that homeschooled students don't get in a homeschool environment compared to a public schooled environment. And before anyone says something snarky like, "yeah like pregnant." No shit. But when it is done under a highly Christian and Conservative hand, it is detrimental that other things are taught. By other things, I am talking about Darwinism.
-Gasp- Yes. Darwinism. Evolution. And of course, something I am an advocate for-- comprehensive sex education. Yes folks, I want to teach the younger generation about having safe sex. Because safe sex is better than unprotected sex. It prevents pregnancy and some STDs (Sexually Transmitted Diseases).
Another problem, that I see, with home schooling is that home schooled students are not really... acclimated to the same experiences as a public schooled children and teens. For instance, in a home schooled environment, a teen or child could be 'exposed' to other people by say... their parents taking them to church. That's not being exposed to other kinds of people. Sorry to say. And I know there will be some backlash at me for stating this.
I know a girl in home school that was not taught Darwinism nor sexual education. The basis? Her parents are Christian Conservatives. Yes, I am quite aware that she isn't my child or whatever, but there is a curriculum that they must follow. No? It isn't set by the state, but by the school district. It worries me, because this girl is my friend, that she is not getting the education she needs. I mean, yes, you can believe in Creationism to your hearts content but there is no scientific proof of women being made from a man's rib. That's magic.
Anyway. The Missouri Department of Education for graduating includes:
Common Core State Standards:
"The Common Core State Standards, also called the Core Academic Standards in Missouri, define what students should know and be able to do at every grade level in grades K-12...." (from The Francis Howell School District site, Under Core Curriculum.)
Though, on the document itself, it states there is no 'opt-out' option unless the parents would like to homeschool their students, blah blah blah....
And again, straight from the Francis Howell site (since they live in that school district) I am just simply going to link the curriculum for health education you are required (by law) to learn in 9th grade. The 9th Grade Health Curriculum
In there it talks about following the districts curriculum about contraception. -Gasp!- Which covered by Francis Howell, is condoms. And they touch on pills... I believe. It's been about 5 years since I took the course.
Ah! There it is! Under the Biology (which you take in 10th grade!) it says that one of the learning objectives is "Genetic variation sorted by the natural selection process explains evidence of biological evolution " You know, Darwinism? Yeah, part of the curriculum. The 10th Grade Biology Curriculum
This girl says that she took Anatomy and Physiology, but did they teach the reproductive system? Probably not, since in a 'Christian Curriculum' there is no way that they would let her look at an anatomically correct drawing of a penis, but maybe a vagina, since she is a woman. Let us look at the curriculum of the Anatomy and Physiology, shall we?
"The reproductive system deals with secondary sexual characteristics and the formation of gametes for the perpetuation of the human species."
And if you cannot tell me anything about this after taking this class, then you are not being taught correctly, I am afraid. At least, in my opinion. I believe, in my year that I took this class, we almost ran out of time to learn this information, but my teachers thought it was important, so they taught it and we didn't get to dissect something. The Anatomy and Physiology Curriculum
And there will be a few more things that I will be posting in the next few days. More educational, since I am writing this to help her learn what the 'Christian curriculum' she is getting will not teach her.
Thank you guys,